March 21 [Wed], 2007, 13:01
i just want to be crazy
somehow i just need to start doing what i want to

do not be afraid

i need to become a real person.

i read in the books, the ones that i do read ... about what it means to be living. i am just stagnant. this must change. i have so much potential, but time is running out. if i don't develop quickly, i'll lose all my chances. opportunities are just slipping by ...

for example, i'm losing my friends.
for example, i can't do anything.
for example, i have no hobbies.
for example, i'm not good at anything.
for example, i'm a bad student.
for example, i'm not independent.
for example, i've never held a job.

please help me help myself.
first things first ...
spring break -- get organized.
summer break -- develop some personality.
back to school -- get a job, an internship; think about my goals in life, and how i want to live it ...

a new beginning 

April 11 [Mon], 2005, 3:24
Ok. Today I really really am going to fix my life. I just need to:

1) finish all homework
2) clean room
3) take biology diagnostic test
4) study for an ap test
5) lose 40+ pounds
6) be fit
*7) practice the piano
*8) practice voice
*9) do well in school

Um, we'll see. I've got to clean up my life this month. It's the last quarter, and I need to have my teachers like me so I can get some good teacher recs.

I gotta decide (probably by the end of this month or May) what colleges to apply to.

I gotta get more community service hours and dedicate myself to the piano.

I gotta get to Japan.

I gotta learn Japanese, then.

I gotta have some hobbies and do things like Maya does. That girl ... ><

Please, I can't fail now. I'm 16&1/2 years old, I'm getting old. I don't want my life to pass before me without playing the central part in it.

Please, I don't want to be sad anymore! I want to rule my life.{超びっくり}


March 21 [Mon], 2005, 15:19
Hey, this is pretty awesome. I don't really understand the Japanese, but I'm going to figure it all out and become cool :P

Um the only thing is that I can't figure out how to post ...
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