不安

May 11 [Sat], 2013, 10:48
I don't know what I'm feeling right now. I feel so down. I dunno if it's because of him. I have no idea what I want to happen. Thinking about breaking up with him frightens me. But staying with him is painful. I dunno what this is. This distance kills me. He's so close yet so far away.
悔しいよ…

2013年05月05日

May 05 [Sun], 2013, 8:24
おはーo(`ω´ )o
Good morning
I have of paperworks to finish today. I need to submit them tomorrow morning. Ugh, my professor's a slave driver
Anyway, let's make this a productive day

今日の朝ごはん
ま、ご飯なんてないけどww

今日は一日がんばろ〜と

The one I cared for the most

May 04 [Sat], 2013, 23:56
"Do you still love me?" he said. Honestly, I was surprised when I read that. I didn't know what to say and the strange thing is, I felt something. It was painful and it felt like I swallowed a huge pill or something. It was that kind of feeling. For a moment I was sad.
But after shaking it off, I knew that I have to accept the truth. What I felt definitely wasn't love. It was pity, guilt and anger.
Am I being unfair? He left me hanging when I needed him the most. He wasted all of my love and effort. For 3 years, I poured out all of my feelings for him but he just ignored them. Now he demands me to love him? To wait for him? No. That's just too much.
I know that I may sound like I'm being heartless but I have to do this for myself. I have to protect myself somehow. For myself and for those people who truly care about me and understand me. I shouldn't let myself get affected by his painful words.
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