Thinking one 

2005年07月02日(土) 22時32分
Can you think of one thing only for one hour, without stopping, without ever looking other things ?

Can you think of your breath only for one hour, without stopping, without ever looking other things ?

Would you consider doing it, I believe in my heart, I can wake us from our fantasy

Current status 

2005年07月02日(土) 22時25分
Current status, ...

Collecting information, running tests, retrieving information, processing, ...

- if I die now, I will be reborn as a miserable ghost
- if I live but not change myself, I will be reborn in hell after death
- if I live but not seriously changing myself, I will reborn as a less miserable ghost
- if I kill myself, I will be reborn as a little more miserable ghost

Still, do I feel worried, no ... oh my ... there is no miracle in this life .


2005年07月02日(土) 22時18分
I saw a little dog, 2 months of age it could be. Looks that he is sick, so skinny. With shaking body, have tried to give a little help, but which result of even little effect. He only eat a little meat, not even like milk . Now seeing again, I am imaging he would be in hunger. Oh misery, ... and myself ???


2005年07月02日(土) 21時31分
Oh my god, I am dreaming now. Have to wake up, have to wake up . It is burning, the way is dangerous. But alas we are all dreaming, and it is soooo real. Can you see the truth, can you ??? Wake the others please ... I need to wake myself, see the truth. The truth is not in the mirror, oh fake, it is a more illogical fantasy. Now and here, now and here, the truth is now and here ... now and here ... and now I am dreaming again. Oh stupid me.

After death 

2005年07月02日(土) 21時27分
There is the death. I don't know when it will come. Maybe after this, who know, or one year later.

When it comes, new life I will face then. What life, a misery I can see. I am walking into misery, then but why do I feel nothing. No worry, oh stupid me.


2005年07月02日(土) 21時24分
It's lonely here. Shadows are walking, only small light I can see. The light is there, but my feet are heavy.
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