私は茶が好きです。

November 05 [Thu], 2009, 17:06
日本語は とても むずかしい です。
明日 テスト が あります。
私は テスト が 好きじゃない。

くそっ。 私は学校に行きたくありません。
外に さむい です。

私はたくさんの紅茶を買う必要があります。

~

i'm seeing my high school play tonight...ick.
Macbeth is my least favorite Shakespeare play.

i can't wait till rehearsals for the musical start.
i'm so excited that i got in this year (:

i think i need to make an other cup of tea....oops.



p.s.
Remember, remember, the fifth of November
The gunpowder treason and plot.
I know of no reason
Why the gunpowder treason
Should ever be forgot.

こんは゛んは (:

October 20 [Tue], 2009, 20:07

今日は非常に悪い一日だった。
外側 は とても さむい て゛す ぬぇぇ。
冬、今年初めに開始されます。
でも、ハロウィーンはまだありません
ブー。。。

i love winter, but this is definitely too early.
it was snowing on sunday....it's fuckin' october ><;;

i had a mucho cuddle fest yesterday.
i think i fell asleep in my friend seb's arms over 7 times.
he fell asleep on me, so it's all good.

and we kinda just abused maia, haha.
nah, she cuddled with us too (:

i'm thinking about either dropping Japanese or taking French along side it next year.
私は言語が大好きです。 {笑}
フランス語は美しい言語です。
日本語素晴らしい言語ですが、私は本当に私の先生のような。

also, i'm auditioning for the school musical tomorrow.
if i make that and the gymnastics team, it's going to be impossible to function.
i think if i got it, it's choose the musical over gymnastics. haha.
who knows, i guess i'll just have to wait and see.

i saw Esther's tattoo today (she's the gorgeous spanish girl in my math class).
it's a butterfly, and it's so sexy.
we spent most of long block math talking about cigarettes and how hungry we were.
it was pretty special <3


god, i hate guys. i think max, sebs, dmitriy and tommer are my only close guy friends that i can stand.
see there's this one guy, i see him almost every day, that i used to be close with.
summer changes people. it's true.
even maia said that he's different, more...asshole like.
i miss the good old days.

oh, and my World of Warcraft free trial ends today....fml.

watashi no sexuality wa fucked up desu. yup, i said it.

October 16 [Fri], 2009, 20:02


my orientation is killing me.
i think i might be a lesbian but i fear that i'll just wind up back where i started....
confused. single. and tormented.

there's nothing i can really do at 16.
i can't do anything till i'm in college.
and i'll never be able to get married to a woman and keep it a secret from my mom.
so i'm fucked. it's pure and simple.

maybe i should just stop trying and become asexual, ne?
or something of the sort.
i hate being part of a russian orthodox family.
i hate not being able to be myself.
i hate it.

i've been feeling more attracted to women lately,
but i'm scared to "fall in love" or date them.
mostly because
i don't want to have to lie...to my mom, to some of the friend, to myself, etc.

and, i don't want to hurt again.
i won't be able to handle it...i might fall apart.

こんは゛んわ

October 05 [Mon], 2009, 19:15
こにちわ みなさん。
おけ゛んき て゛すか。
私は まあまあ て゛す。
学校がいらいらしています。
私は本当にそれが大嫌いです。
尻〔ばか者〕の痛みです。。。

i've been writing a lot of poetry lately.
it's kinda comforting, kinda not.
i mean, it gets all my emotions out in a good way,
but it also sometimes attracts some unwanted attention.
people do seem to like my writing though. that's a good sign, ねえぇぇ。

staying up all night, watching the moon and feeling the cool breeze has become my favorite pass time.
it's really serene and that's something that i lack in my life.

i've taken up the piano again. i love playing, but i NEED to learn how to practice.
otherwise, the classes will stop.
i can't have that...i need music in my life. like, NEED it, need it.

私は音楽を演奏するのが大好きです。
同様に踊りが良いです。

and i need to learn how to fucking do homework.
0.0 x.X o.O -_- z_Z etc, etc...

hahaha, blogging is fun.
ZOMGGG!!!! HALLOWEEN IS SOON!!!!
so is the Halloween Bagly dance =]
......i'm gonna have fuuuuuuun.



....i fucking wish he'd acknowledge my existence.
....i fucking wish he still cared.
....i fucking wish he was still mine.
.....i fucking wish that he waited to ask me.
.....i fucking wish i didn't mess up.

*sigh*

にゃあん!

September 26 [Sat], 2009, 19:11
姉 は とても やさし て゛す。
きょう わたし は かいもの を します。
姉 は 無指の手袋 グローブ か゛ 私に買ってあげられた 。
グローブ は 虹 て゛す。
私 は とても うれしい て゛すよ。

私 は すこし く゛あい か゛わるい て゛す。
ふ゛ぅぅぅぅ。

i don't like feeling sick xD i think a caught a cold. stupid runny nose XD
i love love love my rainbow gloves, though.
i know what to wear to the March on Washington!!

i need to remind my mom about that tonight.

i haven't used yaplog in such a long time. そう て゛すねえええ。
i miss it hahaha.

school sucks, sophmore year is boringg.
i'll blog about it later.

し゛ゃ また。

my life during the last days of summer

August 30 [Sun], 2009, 13:48
i won't even describe germany with more words than this one: awesome.
(for now at least)

gah. here's my life.

1. i can't get several of my ex's out of my head.
2. both of them possibly hate my guts.
3. i kinda like one of ex's exes.
4. i can't ask my ex's ex out or tell them i like them because i'm trying to make up with that ex.
5. i'm trying very hard to get back into "school" mode....it's not working.
6. i'm basically gonna have to juggle getting good grades and rekindling all my old friendships this year. major effort eater, but it must be done.


yup. life's a bed of roses. xD
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