Miles away 

October 19 [Thu], 2006, 5:31
Ihr glaubt mir nicht? HA! Na an was erinnert euch das..ach..ups ich meinte wohl an...WEN?!
----
Miles Away
There's hopeless smiles brighter than mine
And I need for you to come and go
Without the truth falling out.

Old incisions refusing to stay
Like sun through the trees on a cloudy day

You brighten my life like a polystyrene hat
But it melts in the sun like a life without love
And I've waited for you so I'll keep holding on
Without You(2X)

Telephone
Socially scared and impaired
If the trees will bloom the wind can blow
Without the fruit falling out

Old incisions refusing to stay
Like sun through the trees on a cloudy day

You brighten my life like a polystyrene hat
But it melts in the sun like a life without love
And I've waited for you so I'll keep holding on
Without You(2X)

Feels like the wind blows
Holding you with us
She takes no other
False light and ashes
Blooming like winter

You brighten my life like a polystyrene hat
But it melts in the sun like a life without love
And I've waited for you so I'll keep holding on
Without You(3x)

Thank you Jin 

October 19 [Thu], 2006, 5:22
Millionaire say
Got a big shot deal
And thrown it all away but
But I'm not too sure
How I'm supposed to feel
Or what I'm supposed to say
But I'm not, not sure,
Not too sure how it feels
To handle every day
And I miss you love

Make room for the pray
'Cause I'm coming in
With what I wanna say but
It's gonna hurt
And I love the pain
A breeding ground for hate but...

I'm not, not sure,
Not too sure how it feels
To handle everyday
Like the one that just past
In the crowds of all the people

Remember today
I've no respect for you
And I miss you love
And I miss you love

I love the way you love
But I hate the way
I'm supposed to love you back

It's just a fad
Part of the teen, teenage angst brigade and
I'm not, not sure,
Not too sure how it feels
To handle everyday
Like the one that just past
In the crowds of all the people

Remember today
I've no respect for you
And I miss you love
And I miss you love

Remember today
I've no respect for you
And I miss you love
And I miss you love

I love the way you love
But I hate the way
I'm supposed to love you back

------
Wow.
Ich sitze hier herum, bin relativ verzweifelt, hab meine Umzugskartons durchgewuehlt und mein altes Silverchair Lieblingsalbum gefunden.
Ich hoere es mir gerade an. Danke Jin du hast mich direkt in alte Zeit katapultiert, als ich so ca. 13 - 14 Jahre alt war. Ich merke gerade beim hoeren das ich damals keine wirkliche Ahnung hatte was ich da ueberhaupt hoere. Ja, schon. Ich konnte es uebersetzen. Aber...in diesem alter VERSTEHT man einfach nicht die BEDEUTUNG der Texte da man sie nicht wirklich nachvollziehen kann. Mit mittlerweile 20 muss ich sagen...OMG Jin Why?! Genies! Wenn ich frueher gewusst haette das ich alles mal so gut nachvollziehen kann...

Trotzdem liebe ich AAA. Yes. AAA is Love. Thanks destiny!

Not 'For you I would die' but 'For you I live' 

October 09 [Mon], 2006, 7:15
Ich hab mich dazu entschlossen (spontan) dieses Journal nur noch fuer meine "Wortkotze" zu benutzen.
1. Wer liest das hier schon
2. Manchmal muss man einfach seine Gedanken aufschreiben

dh. ich benutze es wie Dumbledore sein Denkarium (toll, was?) also wundert euch nicht falls hier mal dinge stehen sollten die kein normalsterblicher wirklich nachvollziehen kann.

mit diesen worten,
bye bycycle

I realize - i feel dreams 

October 05 [Thu], 2006, 4:16
The path I must step across
is something I should decide
with my own will
I love you, and hope I can say it
without averting my eyes
---

I've stopped watching "deep impact" because it gaves me a weird feeling.
i've made many mistakes in the past and i can't change my decisions. I know this but...if i could...i really...
ah whatever. i'm sorry. still can't talk about it. long lasting secrets aren't that easy to share. i feel bad about it.
i know it was wrong and everytime i think about it, i feel like i have to cry but i can't change those circumstances.
maybe secrets aren't that good. but..let me ask you one question: why now?

i love you.
thank you.
i won't give up.
promise.

xxx
yours

Bye Bicycle my beloved pink sunglasses 

August 29 [Tue], 2006, 5:13
i've never felt so much uncomfortable in my whole life.

what should i do?
what can i do?

Nothing.
And that's the sad truth.

Bye Bicycle.

i wanna be your idol 

August 24 [Thu], 2006, 3:31
what can i do to be next to you
you can't see me, too far... to find me
No matter how much i scream, it won't reach you
Look this way

Every day i try to make up
Hey, do you know why?
Wanna be your idol
Keep my name in your heart
Become obsessed with me
Wanna be your idol!

Take my pink bouquet and card
For you
I'd die
It's true, darling!

Even if I scream and jump up
You can't see me, baby
You know you're my idol
I don't care
I'll become lovelier
Wanna be your idol!

Just call your name
Until our eyes meet so many times
But...you can't see me
Fate is ironic
I want to be special to you
Want you to know me
Coz I'll be beautiful

Every day I try to make up
Hey, do you know why?
Wanna be your idol
Keep my name in your heart
Become obsessed with me
Wanna be your idol!

Even if I scream and jump up
You can't see me, baby
You know you're my idol
I don't care
I'll become lovelier
Wanna be your idol!

母へ・・・ 

August 23 [Wed], 2006, 7:33
ich kann nicht schlafen.
ich muss.
aber ich kann nicht.
ich heatte es mir nicht ansehen sollen.
selbst schuld.
wieso isshi..

貴女の悲しげな顔を覗いた夜 何故だか怖くてきつく目蓋閉じていた
もしもあの時に戻る事が叶えば 「どうして泣いているの」って優しく開けるのだろう…

es passiert mir einfach zu viel und gleichzeitig zu wenig.
ich bin so durcheinander.

HOOWA 

August 22 [Tue], 2006, 1:28
I miss you, I miss you
Stopping at the end of 100 million light years

I miss you, I miss you
Another 400 thousand kilometers away the moon grins

I miss you, I miss you
If you had returned by the southern line

I miss you, I miss you
Your lips came close
Just another millimeter and saturation is reached

i wanna be... 

August 22 [Tue], 2006, 1:26
I wanna be I wanna be I wanna be just like a melody
just like a simple sound like in harmony

I wanna be I wanna be I wanna be just like the sky
just fly so far away to another place

To be away from all, to be one of everything

I wanna be I wanna be I wanna be just like the wind
just flowing in the air through an open space

I wanna be I wanna be I wanna be just like the sky
just fly so far away to another place

I wanna be I wanna be I wanna be just like the sea
just swaying in the water so to be at ease

To be away from all, to be one, of everything

I wanna be I wanna be I wanna be just like a melody
just like a simple sound like in harmony

i hate myself and i want to die 

August 20 [Sun], 2006, 20:47
you know the songtitel "i hate myself and i want to die?"
that's EXACTLY how i feel right now.
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